Ring-spun Japanese denim, stupidly expensive tee shirts, fetching shoes and charming handbags: these are the items I formerly threw my money at like a subprime mortgage lender circa 2005. But in fact, there is a whole list of consumer goods that I really, truly don't care about, and only replenish when they stop working as advertised. This list includes cell phones, iPods, computers and cars. Oh, and workout clothes, but I believe we've already retired that sad horse to an afterlife of mucilage and violin strings.
Let's review. As of April 14th:
• Cell phone: Sorry? What did you say? Oh sorry! My phone didn't ring. Hello? Hello? No I didn't get your text...and I'm not just saying that to make myself look like a better friend.
• iPod: Will no longer load music. (Not even Coldplay.) Have restored factory settings five times in seven days. Is currently click-rev-repeating the Apple screen in endless cycle. Considering burying it under floorboard a là Tell Tale Heart.
• Computer (aka Carrie Bradshaw): Spins beach ball of death 78% of usage time. Had to reopen iPhoto six times to upload that picture of my butt. (Was it was objecting to the subject matter?)
• Car: FRANTICALLY KNOCKING ON WOOD
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2 comments:
We could offer you a gently used iPod and one of several mac laptops.
if only my iPhone worked with my tapedeck adaptor in my car stereo, I would give you my rad Nano, two years old and still FULL of FIRE. Maybe we can work something out. You would love its slimhood.
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